Daddy - Philip Ban Lee Ooi (RIP)

Below is not so much a eulogy but a sharing on how my life has been nurtured by the love of such a wonderful father. It was read towards the end of the funeral service at the Church of the Holy Trinity, Singapore on March 29, 2008.

Before I share with you about my dad, on behalf of my Mum, Agnes and my brother Mark and family, I’d like to firstly express our thanks and gratitude to
Fr Johnson Fernandez,
Fr Paul Pang
Msgr Eugene Vaz
for celebrating the birth of my father into eternal life.

And to each of you who are here to express your condolences today and for the past days. Your kind support, prayers, and expressions of love during our time of bereavement are much appreciated…

Philip Ooi Ban Lee – my Dad, was born on July 1, 1922 in Penang, brought up in Ipoh and was the eldest of 11 children. Because his father died at a young age, Dad being the eldest had to take care of the rest of his siblings, seeing that the youngest ones went through school etc before he himself settled down. Thus it was only at 38 that he got married to my Mum, ten years his junior, whom he met while working in Singapore.

For most of his working life, Dad was a rehabilitation officer in Changi Prison and my brother Mark and I lived most of our childhood in the security of the gated community of the prison compound. Being an active sportsman, having played both soccer and hockey for the state of Perak in his younger days, Dad spent most of his recreational time also playing sports. When I was young, I remember accompanying him to the tennis court, the football field and even to the billiard room!

Dad was a man of few words, unassuming, always smiling with a good sense of humour and when he’s familiar with you, he would always joke with you or say a witty one liner that would get you cracking.

My fondest memories of my Dad were the bedtime stories he would tell me – sometimes spontaneously made up, and with me ending as the protagonist. Dad also taught me to tell the time, to ride the bike, and to remember that “honesty is the best policy”!

Perhaps the greatest gift Dad gave me was to reflect God’s love for me – gentle and unconditional. I vividly remember once when I was about 6 years old, and my parents were throwing a party. They had just returned from the supermarket – Tay Ban Guan – and there were many plastic bags in the car. In my eagerness to help them, I carried a bag which was much too heavy for my little arms, and it dropped! To my horror it contained bottles of liquor – wine and gin etc and everything broke. My Dad rushed to me, and I expected a scolding or spanking. Instead he reached for my hands and asked if I had cut myself and if I was ok. He didn’t care at all about the broken bottles nor the wasted money!

Another incident was when I sneaked to watch the TV when I wasn’t supposed to. I guess I was in Primary One at that time. Dad caught me and came up to me and I shut my eyes thinking “oh oh I’m in deep trouble!” Instead of a scolding, he embraced me, carried me and gave me a kiss!

Of course there were also times when he disciplined me with a good spank. Once my next door neighbour who was also my kindergarten mate and I were playing, we decided to create a swimming pool in the house by filling our bath tub. So there we were splashing and jumping in with all our clothes on. Then whamp! My butt was hit! Ouch! My Dad had just retuned from work. He gave us a good scolding, sent my neighbour home and immediately bathed and dried me up.

My Dad also gave me a good lesson in gender roles – that they are interchangeable! I remember once when our maid was away, Mum who was teaching fetched my brother Mark and I from school and when we returned home, we found Dad in the kitchen preparing dinner for us! It was a delicious meal! He also helped in the housework and always made the effort to carry his plate back to the kitchen even when we had a maid to clear the table.

Dad was also not afraid to show his emotions. When my grandmother passed away in Ipoh, I saw my Dad weeping profusely after he received the news from a phone call.

When I was called to the religious life, Dad was sad but he also said to me, “well you’re big enough to decide what you want to do. If you think this will make you happy then go ahead.” And so he continued to support me in my choices in life and sometimes even reminded me of my consecrated life. Once I was sharing a joke with my family (a not very decent joke!) and while trying to contain his laughter, Dad turns to me and said, “hey you’re a nun, are you sure you can tell this kind of joke!”

Last year my Dad was diagnosed with aneurysm in his abdomen – the swelling of a blood vessel. One option was surgery but because of his age, it was risky. So all of us in the family including my Dad opted to leave it and leave him in God’s hands. We were warned that if it burst, the chances of saving him would be slim. It leaked last Easter Monday – and from Nairobi, I got the news that Dad was dying. I hoped to see him before he left but I didn’t make it in time. He was born to eternal life at 1.30am in the morning of Easter Tuesday, also the solemnity of the Annunciation and my 5th anniversary of perpetual vows.

My Dad lived up to 85 – my family and I are grateful to God for his long life. A life spent serving the second world war when he was in his late teens, a life sacrificing or delaying his own plans till all his siblings went through school, a life being a patient and loving husband, and a wonderful Dad and grandfather.

It’s always sad to say goodbye but the good thing about goodbyes is that there is hope for a better hello. In Dad’s case, that hello will be in heaven when we reunite with him for ever. So as I thank God for the gift of a loving Dad, I also thank Dad for the wonderful life he lived, and for being the best Dad any child would ever hope for. I know that his spirit lives in me and I pray that I have also caught on some of his qualities! Thank you Daddy and see you again one day!

I’d like to end this sharing with a slide tribute to my Dad accompanied by a song by Nat King Cole who was my Dad’s favourite singer and we hear him sing here with his daughter, Natalie Cole.

Uploaded on authorSTREAM by wendyfsp

(song "Unforgettable" by Nat King Cole and Natalie Cole)

Suzanne Vega

Read this document on Scribd: Suzanne Vega Candid Views (plus Growing in Contemplation with SV cont'd)

Growing in Contemplation wi... by Wendy Ooi, fsp

Suzanne Vega Candid Views (... by Wendy Ooi, fsp

TRANSCRIPT OF INTERVIEW

You have this great ability to capture a moment or an event, reflect upon it, go deeper, and express your reflection in the most literate words, in metaphors and music. When did you realize that this is something you could share with the world and how was this gift developed and nurtured?
Well I think I was about 11 when I started to play the guitar. And I was 11 in 1971 and so it was a time in music where there was a lot going on. You know, Bob Dylan was being played on the radio and I was always impressed with his songs which weren’t like the typical pop songs. Not that ...I also loved pop music, I was always listening to the radio but I remember hearing Bob Dylan and thinking I really love that and I would like to be like that kind of writer. And since I was already writing poetry, I sort of found a way to set it to music and then when I was 14 I started writing songs and then when I was 16 I started performing on stage and that was a big leap to grow from being very introspective which is sitting in my room creating songs to actually going on stage and performing them for the people was sort of a big transition for me.

And how did you develop and nurture it further?
First of all, my parents were always… interested in what I was doing. I would talk about the lyrics with my step father and he took it seriously and they certainly never stood in my way in terms of my going out to audition. I would go anywhere in the city as a teenager. They didn’t exactly take me there you know I would go and do it myself but they never stood in my way and they were always interested in it. And then I sort of nurtured it through just the people who would come up to me after an audition and say your lyrics really meant a lot to me. Usually one or two people in a crowd that would come up and say what you said really got me thinking and so that was usually enough to get me going to the next day.

When your early albums came out, your contemplative lyrics and rhythmic sounds were attributed to your Buddhist background and chanting (Nichiren Shoshu Buddhism). To what extent was that a major influence and is it still an influence today?
I chant from time to time. I sort of stopped practicing Buddhism full time in somewhere around ’91 or ’92. Recently I have been doing it again because my daughter has suddenly taken an interest in it and she and my mother have been practicing Buddhism which is really interesting so in an effort to help my daughter in her spiritual quest I have been sort of getting back to it again myself, not quite to the degree that I was when I was younger. But I find it really interesting and it is a nice bond between my mother and my daughter and they do some of the Buddhist activities together, and study meetings and that sort …..
Hmm I think actually what it was is that both elements – it’s not so much the Buddhism influence in music, it’s really more that I’ve loved things that are rhythmic and both of those happen to be rhythmic and so because I have that in my character you know, I just like both of those things.

So do you give yourself some quiet time to contemplate?
Structured? I don’t. I mean I have quiet time because I have a lot of it in the bus. There’s a lot of time where I can either be in my bunk or I can be looking out the window and I tend to not to want to pass the time by watching television. All the guys are in the back watching TV shows that they have on dvds and I prefer just to sit in the front and sort of look out the window and write or go on the computer. So it’s not structured but it’s just something (that I think about) and on the road I do get some amount of it.

One of the things I appreciate about your music is that it has an edge – it doesn’t shy away from the gritty urban setting. It brings one to confront the realities of life. Growing up in Spanish Harlem is probably a factor. Yet how are you able to see the beauty amidst the urban setting? To make poetry and music out of the city life which can be pretty rough, pretty tough at times?
Well I think you have to. As a child growing up you learn to see moments of beauty where they exist and you feel grateful for them. Even if I weren’t a writer or trying to write it all down, I would still notice those things. I think everybody needs some kind of beauty in their life no matter how hard their life is or how difficult and there’s plenty of poverty and bad things that happen in rural places too. Those hardships don’t only exist in the city, they exist pretty much everywhere. So I think if you’re in one of those situations where you’re struggling really hard, you need those moments of beauty to keep you going and so you kind of train your eye to look out for them and to notice them and to be grateful for them.

You don’t try to make any explicit social commentary or political statement with your songs – but besides entertaining and moving your listeners, is there a message that you hope your songs will be able to convey? Or one that may inspire listeners?
If it’s a message I think it’s that those exalted moments that we would hope for happen every day. There are moments every day where you either see a child or you see something growing despite all odds. Those are sort of exalted spiritual moments that exist every day. It’s not just the Sunday when you go to church or for a special time when you sit at an altar. These spiritual moments don’t only happen when you want them to or when you force them. I think that there’s a value in every single day that you can find and that you need to appreciate because you’re not going to have it forever. So I think that’s the sort of …I try to startle everybody … there are some writers who do it really well …to have this ability to make you aware of the fact that you’re alive and that it’s temporary …not to be morbid but that you have to appreciate it and value it while it’s here because it really is something quite amazing.

St Clare is the only song among your solo albums that was written by someone other than you -Jack Hardy- and it’s probably the closest among your songs linked to the Catholic tradition. What is it about the song that you like and who is St Clare to you?
First of all I think I have the same birthday as St. Clare – I think she was born on July 11 which is sort of an aside. [St. Clare's actual birthdate is July 16, 1194. She died on Aug 11. 1253. The Church celebrates her feast day on Aug 11.]
St. Clare – I’m trying to remember now.. it’s been so long…
I thought it was a beautiful melody and again I can’t remember what my state of mind was I was singing this song. There was something in the lyrics that I felt spoke to my state of mind at that time. (sings Call on the saint) It’s sort of like calling upon on the saint for protection as you travel through the world. I have to look at the lyrics again but there was something in the lyrics that made me feel that it was something that I was looking for myself at that moment.

[ St. Clare by Jack Hardy

call on that saint
and the candle that burns
keeping her safe
until her return

plaster and paint
holding the fire
a poor woman's saint
holding all man's desire

bold little bird
fly away home
could I but ride herd
on the wind and the foam

all of the souls
that curl by the fire
they never know
all man's desire

watercress clings
to the banks of the stream
in the first grip of spring
when the snow melts to green

barefoot and cold
and holding a lyre
by the side of the road
holding all man's desire

call on the saint
when the white candle burns
keeping her safe
until her return ]

Lately I’ve been reading about Mother Theresa and her inner life. It’s a book that came about that got a lot of discussion in the press about her doubts and how she lived with her doubts and how she continued in spite of the fact that she felt this darkness inside of her and that’s been a very interesting book to read. I haven’t finished it yet but I’m about three quarters through. It’s amazing to think that someone who had such a vivid interior life had such a big effect on the world and that these vows that she made were very personal, very interior and that someone who had that kind of life can achieve so much in the real world because that quality is not something that we think of as being valued in our society today. It’s all about action and numbers, and how much are you selling and how much are you doing and big sweeping gestures. Meantime there’s this woman in India who went through these experiences that were something you can’t see from the outside, these experiences that she had were internal. So I’ve been just very impressed by that world that she lived in and how she was able to do this great work and not be corrupted by it and not be swayed.

What she was experiencing is described in Catholic spirituality as part of the maturing of faith where one seeks the God of consolations rather than simply the consolations of God.
I guess you’re seeking to be the consoling presence and you don’t receive it yourself.
Ya, it was a very interesting book and some of it was surprising to me…
For example – that she heard voices and saw visions but that that was not impressive to her superiors – they sort of said yes you may be experiencing those things but you have to put that aside, it doesn’t mean you’re special and that you need your work to be done because of that…most people would think that that is something that would qualify her to do the work but instead they are saying that that’s not that qualifies you, you have to put that away.
The other thing that was surprising to me was that she specifically asked for girls who were cheerful and healthy in their bodies. We think of spiritual girls as being sort of penitent – they want to deny themselves food, or they are very thin, or very pale and they are not very hardy and actually she was asking for the opposite kind of girls. She wanted someone sturdy, strong, cheerful who’s capable of hard work.
And also how she didn’t believe in the penitent view of things. It was more like make yourself well, make yourself healthy and go out and do God’s work in the world instead of always focus on yourself and having penitence for yourself. It was like well don’t think about that, that’s not really the issue.
And she had that clear directive within herself no matter what and wasn’t swayed by it and wasn’t broken by it either. You can easily imagine that she’d go out into the street and contract some disease but she lived to be 87 and it’s an amazing life and she wasn’t corrupted by the realities of the world. I think that’s amazing. It’s very hard to do that, it’s very hard not to be corrupted by all that.

Many people who buy your albums have not had the chance to hear you live – what would you say you bring to a live performance that is different to listening to studio recorded songs?
I think that the live shows add a lot. Anyone who listens to the records and has not been to a live show would think that I’m very serious and sad and that I use very long words and I’m always thinking about things which is true to some degree but what I try to do when I’m on stage is to entertain and to make people laugh a little bit or to bring things down to earth a little bit, to give a little piece of the story that makes it more real because a lot of the songs are really pretty difficult, they are very dense, and they are about “weird” topics and so a little explanation helps it and little a bit of laughter doesn’t hurt.

What’s your philosophy in life? Your attitude in living, given your experience of setbacks and disappointments in life?
I have my own setbacks and disappointments but I think that you really need to find whatever positive thing you can find out of the day, out of the situation, out of the moment, no matter how dark it is or how depressed you’re feeling, you must find a reason to get out of bed, even if it’s just to make a cup of tea, and you can find pleasure in that cup of tea. That’s enough reason to get out of bed. So that’s what I’m always trying to find, is that those moments of either pleasure, or joy or happiness – just some reason to keep going and I think that’s really important.
The other thing is I think I’ve learned over the years that love is not just a personal thing between two people, that when the Beatles sang about love and when people talked about love, they are really talking about a general kind of love, and that you have to learn how to love your neighbour, love your family and there’s a part of loving that’s impersonal and we don’t really think about that much in this society, we are always speaking about romantic love and all that stuff and there’s really so much more to it and getting in touch with that kind of love is as important as the romantic part of it.
---------
The beauty and the value is in the person not the view of love. I think as I’ve gotten older, the songs are starting to be less about alienation and a little more about love that is not just usual man woman, sexual love….
(at this point I mentioned to Suzanne about an independent film, Bella)

Even though you’re not a Christian, you have many Christian images like cathedral, belfry, themes of repentance (like the song Penitent) – how did these images unfold?
Well I love cathedrals and to me they are very special places. I am always attracted to them. If I ever go to a city, there are certain images that repeat. There’s the park, there’s the cathedral, (and the hotel). When I was a kid I just loved the cathedral because it’s a special place, it’s a beautiful place. I suppose my grandmother had taken me to church when I was very young in Puerto Ricorico and I don’t remember enough to know what sect it was particularly but I like this idea of getting dressed up and going to a special place on Sundays. To me there’s something timeless about a cathedral. And I think all of those images are very much in our culture. And even a song like Penitent whereas maybe in America we don’t think about penitent that much but certainly if you go to France, Italy or Spain which is where I was when I was thinking of that song, it is very much everywhere, the ideas, it’s in the images, it’s in the paintings, it’s in the atmosphere.

You also wrote a song for the film, Dead Man Walking by Sr. Helen Prejan called Woman On The Tier (I'll See You Through). Tim Robbins who directed it is also Catholic as is Susan Sarandon – how did you get involved with that?
He sent me an email one day and just said, would you like to write this song for this movie. And they sent me the movie and I watched the movie and thought it was very interesting. Then when I read the book, I was just very impressed by the writing, by the quality of the writing and then those pages that I wrote about just jumped out of me. I thought they were really beautiful. Basically he just invited me.

And how do you feel about capital punishment?
I have mixed feelings about it. My husband is a criminal defense lawyer and he’s told me about many cases where people make a mistake or the prisoner is not guilty or that they’re not as guilty as they’re assumed to be. So that’s kind of changed my view, not that I was pro capital punishment, but I think the fact that I’ve had these discussions with my husband has sort of changed my view on it. I think that I probably am more against capital punishment.

When you sing, you sound so relax and cool, does that come naturally or do you tell yourself you want to sound this way?
Not at all! Most of the time when I’m singing, I’m not feeling relaxed or cool. In fact most of the time I’m singing honestly at the top of my lungs. And it’s always a shock to me to go back into the control room and hear my own voice. A song like Ludlow Street or Angels Doorway when I was singing it, I am honestly singing at the top of my lungs and when I go back and listen it always sound the same – it always sounds cool, it sounds relax, it sounds serene or whatever. I don’t understand why that is. I sometimes wish that it would be a little rougher so that people would understand what I’m actually feeling. I think what I’m actually feeling very often does not come often come through in the tone of how I sing. It’s all there in the words, all the turmoil and the emotion is there in the lyrics. But most people listening to me think that I’m just some sort of laid back singer but I’m honestly not. I’m honestly bellowing at the top of my lungs but it just doesn’t come out that way.

Among all the songs you’ve written, which would you say is the most spiritual, or at least brought you to a spiritual level?
I think Penitent and Bound right after that. Especially Penitent – I honestly was feeling exactly that way and it’s a moment that I still think about. And it’s a song I almost feel isn’t quite finished. I was talking to my friend, Jack Hardy about this. We were talking about the idea of the mystic and the mother and the matador and how the three of them are confronting their mortality. The mother is giving birth and is sort of at that gateway between life and death. The matador is facing that animal and the mystic is facing God…it’s just one tiny line in the song but ...
....Or maybe three separate songs…one from the mystic point of view, one from the mother, one from the matador

[ Penitent by Suzanne Vega

Once I stood alone so proud
held myself above the crowd
now i am low on the ground.

From here i look around to see
what avenues belong to me
I can't tell what ive found.

Now what would You have me do
i ask you please?
I wait to hear.

The mother, and the matador,
the mystic, all were here before,
like me, to stare You down.

You appear without a face,
disappear, but leave your trace,
i feel your unseen frown.

Now what would you have me do
I ask you please?
i wait to hear
your voice,
the word,
you say.
i wait to see your sign
would i
obey?

I look for you in heathered moor,
the desert, and the ocean floor
how low does one heart go.

looking for your fingerprints
i find them in coincidence,
and make my faith to grow.

Forgive me all my blindnesses
my weakness and unkindnesses
as yet unbending still.

struggling so hard to see
my fist against eternity
and will you break my will? ]

Some comments on a couple of songs from Beauty and Crime ....
"Pornographer’s Dream" – when I first saw the title, I did wonder what you were going to sing about.
I see that from the audience too – they look so worried at me so I just try to explain beforehand what it’s all about.
Yes I was sure it was a deeper reflection on pornography since some time back you had actually refused an interview with Playboy magazine.
Yes it was one of the first interviews that they had asked me to do. I was doing the video for Marlene On the Wall and they wanted to know if I would do a little interview for Playboy. I just felt very uncomfortable with it and I just said no and I got into a big fight with my manager about it.
So "Pornographer’s Dream" reflects on the deeper issues behind pornography?
Yes it’s the deeper longing underneath it, what is it they’re really longing for underneath it. The pornographer here longs for a more spiritual experience. It’s a song that some people really do get and some other people don’t get it at all. Some other people are like “what are you talking about?” “it’s not true.” But I still think it is true on some level, maybe not true for each specific person but I think that’s what most people want. Most people want what’s good, they don’t want what’s bad. They fall into having an addiction of various kinds but I think ultimately what you’re striving for is some kind of peace, or some kind of goodness and I can’t help but believe in that.

I have to say I really love "As You Are Now" – when I first heard it, I was really touched by it, and the string arrangements makes it even more moving.
I really liked it when I wrote it. I was really worried that people would see it as just being overly sentimental and dismiss it. But I really felt it strongly. I felt that it really showed what I wanted to show about humans – not just because it’s Ruby - but I think that any mother could sing it to any child and that anybody who…I guess it really is a love song …..if you have a child and feel that way about somebody, that they really are special, that they really are precious in the good sense of the word. I’m glad that I wrote it. I don’t sing it all the time but I am happy I wrote it. Ruby likes it but she thinks that the hair and the teeth are creepy and her friends think its creepy too.

ONJ Woman of Grace and Gratitude

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Healing Music from ONJ

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Olivia Newton-John Press Conference Singapore 26 April 2007

Pier Giorgio Frassati

C.S. Lewis

CS Lewis by Wendy Ooi, fsp

DOROTHY DAY - Advocate of the voiceless, Healer of the untouchables

Quotes of Dorothy Day:

If I have accomplished anything in my life, it is because I wasn't embarrassed to talk about God.
Love is the measure by which we will be judged. (She often quoted St. John of the Cross)

People say, "What is the sense of our small effort?" They cannot see that we must lay one brick at a time, take one step at a time.

We plant seeds that will flower as results in our lives, so best to remove the weeds of anger, avarice, envy and doubt, that peace and abundance may manifest for all. The greatest challenge of the day is: how to bring about a revolution of the heart, a revolution which has to start with each one of us. We have all known the long loneliness and we have learned that the only solution is love and that love comes with community. Don't call me a saint - I don't want to be dismissed that easily.

Those who cannot see the face of Christ in the poor are atheists indeed. What I want to bring out is how a pebble cast into a pond causes ripples that spread in all directions. Each one of our thoughts, words, and deeds is like that.

If we are the reason for others to feel unhappy and misunderstood and wrongly accused, then we are caught in sin ourselves.

I don't think of the Passion as the Crucifixion. I think of His whole life as "the Passion." When I think of Jesus I think of someone who was constantly passionate; I think of all His experiences as part of His Passion: the stories He told, the miracles He performed, the sermons He delivered, the suffering He endured, the death He experienced. His whole life was a Passion - the energy, the love, the attention He gave to so many people, to friends and enemy alike.

A community is what St. Paul told us to be - where our differences are granted respect by one another, but those differences not allowed to turn us into loners. You must know when to find your own, quiet moment of solitude, But you must know when to open the door to go be with others, and you must know how to open the door, There's no point in opening the door with bitterness and resentment in your heart.

Quotes on Dorothy Day:

Dorothy Day taught me that justice begins on our knees. I have never known anyone, not even in monasteries, who was more of a praying person than Dorothy Day. Jim Forest, co-founder of the Catholic Peace Fellowship

Few people have had such an impact on my life, even though we never met. . . . Surely, if any woman ever loved God and her neighbour, it was Dorothy Day. The late Cardinal John O'Connor of New York

What she tried to practice was "Christ's technique," as she put it, which was not to seek out meetings with emperors and important officials but with "obscure people; a few fishermen and farm people, a few ailing and hard-pressed men and women."

Biography
She has been called New York City's Mother Teresa, Servant of the Poor, Battler for Justice and Champion of non-violent conflict resolution. Dorothy Day, born on November 8, 1897 in Brooklyn, New York was a suffragette, a social and political writer, and initially rejected Christianity. Before her conversion to the Catholic faith, a love affair with a fellow journalist ended with an abortion. This was followed by a brief and unhappy marriage to a literary promoter. She then entered into a common-law marriage with biologist and anarchist Foster Batterham. Finding herself pregnant with his child she was determined this time to have her baby. It was the birth of her child, Tamar Teresa in 1927 that triggered Dorothy's religious transformation. Her baptism and that of Tamar led to a permanent break with Batterham who was a staunch atheist. Thereafter began her lifetime commitment to integrate her Catholic faith and her radical social values.

Day became a peace and justice activist within the Catholic Church, and is regarded by many as the mother of 20th century spiritual movements, particularly the Catholic Worker Movement which she co-founded with former Christian Brother Peter Maurin in 1932. With her kitchen as the editorial office, they published a newspaper to publicize Catholic social teaching and promote the peaceful transformation of society. When the maiden issue of The Catholic Worker paper was distributed on May 1, 1933, the US was suffering its fourth year of the Great Depression, many banks had collapsed, 13 million workers were unemployed and shantytowns for the homeless had sprung across the country. Within 6 months, the initial circulation of 2,500 copies of the newspaper rose to 100,000 copies.

The following year in 1934, Day and Maurin put into practice the theories of economic justice and Christian teaching written in their paper. In the midst of the slums of New York , they founded the St. Joseph House of Hospitality, a refuge for victims of the Depression, and possibly the first Catholic soup kitchen in .

By 1940 the Catholic Worker paper reached its peak circulation of 185,000 and the Hospitality House had expanded to a network of thirty communities and work farms around the . After Maurin's death in 1949, Day continued at the helm of the Catholic Worker Movement, successfully steering it through the social concerns of the 1950s to the 1970s. Throughout those decades, Day unabashedly and consistently spoke out, condemning fascism, nuclear weapons, and wars. She ended up being arrested countless times. Her balance of radical social beliefs and conservative doctrinal views enabled her to raise awareness, within and outside the Catholic Church, of the struggles for social justice and human rights. (If she were alive in today, she would probably protest in front of Parliament House against having a casino resort here.)Today there are 185 Catholic Worker hospitality houses in the and ten countries around the world. The network of hospitality houses remain true to Day's commitment to non-violence, voluntary poverty, prayer, and hospitality for the homeless, exiled, hungry, and forsaken. Catholic Worker communities continue to protest injustice, war, racism, and violence of all forms.

Dorothy Day died November 29, 1980, Staten Island, New York . Living a life of voluntary poverty, she left no money for her funeral. It was paid for by the archdiocese of New York . In 2000, she was proclaimed Servant of God and the cause of her beatification is ongoing.

I knew very little of Dorothy Day until she was introduced to me during my theological studies at the Loyola School of Theology, Manila, in 1999. Since then I have been a great admirer of Day, but my knowledge of her was only in the abstract. The opportunity to have a more concrete experience of her spiritual legacy came last month when I visited a Catholic Worker Community in Boston.
Haley House, the Catholic Worker House of Hospitality in Boston is located along Dartmouth Street in South End Boston. From the convent of the Daughters of St. Paul in Jamaica Plain, I was dropped off at the Forest Hills subway station and took a 20 minute train ride to Back Bay . From Back Bay it was a 10 minute hike to Haley House. Amidst the crisp biting winter air, I shuffled against the slush of the previous night's snow melting on the sidewalk and with the help of a map, eventually reached Haley House. When I opened the door, the scent of coffee greeted me and the warm air of the house immediately caused condensation on my glasses. I was welcomed with a bear hug, as warm as the house, from Sr. Linda Ballard, osc, the volunteer coordinator and the person I had been in contact with.
The morning meal program at Haley House had already started and volunteers were busy serving and chatting to a number of guests, a couple of whom I noticed were sleeping at the table. I was briefly introduced to the volunteers and after taking a few photos (not directly at the guests I was warned), I offered my services. "You can help with the laundry!" Sr. Linda suggested. So I found myself folding and putting away aprons and rags right in the middle of the kitchen. As some guests came forward to the serving counter for a second helping of breakfast (there was oatmeal, cornflakes, toast, coffee and tea), we exchanged greetings and smiles.
Later in the morning, after all the guests had gone and the cleaning and mopping was done, I joined in the group sharing of the volunteers, some of whom were students at Boston College . They shared on their experiences that morning and on the importance of a personal encounter with each guest. We then moved to the main topic to be discussed that day: the causes of homelessness. It was agreed that the main cause was the lack of a support network especially from family or friends. Instability on different levels (jobs, relationships, health) and the lack of motivation were other contributing factors. It was also pointed out that although some may have family, they did not experience love in their family and thus turned to the streets. Another possible situation was like the case of Eddy, 41 (who I briefly met) whose family lives in Brooklyn, New York but because his parole does not allow him to leave Boston (which is in the state of Massachusetts ), he is unable to return to his family. Eddy was in prison for 20 years and has had a conversion experience. Today he is determined to lead a productive life. After several visits to Haley House, he himself decided to be a volunteer, helping to serve the guests and do the washing up of dishes. The sharing concluded with the question, 'How does society treat the homeless?' The final answer was sadly, 'as a stigma.'
It was interesting for me to discover that the 7 members forming the live-in community at Haley House comprise of non-Catholics. Yet the community is catholic, in the universal, inclusive sense of the word. While most come from a Christian background, there is also a Buddhist in the group. The head of the community is Judy Laris Nichols, a 'post-denominational' priest, ordained in the Episcopalian church. When I asked her where she celebrates mass, her answer was "anywhere - but most especially in the margins." Judy explained to me that the meals program at Haley House is supported from food donation as well as from a food bank (an organisation that distributes USDA - United States Department of Agriculture - surplus, that is donated food that does not get eaten in restaurants) and bulk purchasing. A Clothing Room (all donated clothes) where people can come and get clothes (including the community members) is also available at Haley House. As many of the guests are jobless, they are able to obtain nice business coats for interviews from the Clothing Room.
Besides the jobless and homeless, Haley House also serves the working poor. All guests are treated with dignity and volunteers are reminded that the House is not a place to give handouts to the poor but a home to welcome guests and treat them with respect. As an important part of Day's philosophy, they have a commitment to non-violence and there is never an armed police officer in any Catholic Worker House of Hospitality. Members have to intervene with unruly guests before they exacerbate with violence. If they cannot behave they are barred from the house. There have been occasions though when members and volunteers have been hurt, including Joy Williams, a live-in community member, who suffered a blow from a drunk guest.
Joy Williams, 24, joined Haley House two years ago immediately after graduation from college with the desire to "have a higher understanding of myself in relationship to the world." However she admits that she does not see herself sustaining in this service for a long period because of the energy involved, "I always have to maintain a calmness, even though I sometimes get scared and frightened. The people are always so much bigger. But we try to create a community space filled with mutual respect." As for Dorothy Day, whose room she occupies now (a tiny room where Day used to stay on her visits to Haley House) Joy is in awe of her, "I admire Dorothy's courage and the risk that she took, and I am happy to know there are so many here who are of like mind."
Not only like-minded but also with a heart as big as Dorothy Day is Kathe McKenna, who with her husband, John, founded Haley House in 1966. Their shared compassion for the homeless drew them together and they started taking men lying on the streets back to their apartment for a place to stay the night and something to eat. Kathe and her family now live across the street and she is still very much involved in the activities of Haley House. As with other Catholic Worker houses, Kathe shares that food at Haley House is just the vehicle, "What people are almost always hungry for is relationship, and so that is always emphasized. The soup kitchen is the avenue to break down barriers between people who received a lot in life and have chosen to connect in a very intimate way with people who do not have those privileges, and who are each learning from the other in ways which are often mysterious."
Having personally known and met Day on many occasions, Kathe gave me further insights on the woman she too greatly admires, "Dorothy's heart was with the poor, she had a great passion for the poor. But her real vocation was as a writer. She felt the need of the social concerns of the day and as she threw her lot with the poor, she saw things from their perspective. She integrated her life and lived with the poor and was privy to their needs. Dorothy's two-fold mandate was: 'comforting the afflicted and afflicting the comfortable.' She had a wry, dry sense of humour, was quite reserved but always contemplative and lived a rigorous spiritual life."
The spirit of Dorothy Day lives on in her followers. My grace-filled encounter with the members of Haley House at their ministry was a great humbling experience. I was much edified by their generosity, commitment, compassion and zeal. Through them I encountered Dorothy Day. In her time, as well as today, forlorn guests – be they homeless, jobless, without friends or family – are able to experience an Easter moment when they are welcomed with the warmth of hot food and a genuine smile at Haley House. Their darkness turns into light - even if the light lasts as long as they are in the soup kitchen or, as in the case of Eddy, a light that illuminates and gives them new life.
There may not be a Catholic Worker Hospitality House in Singapore, but I realise that we are each called to provide the hospitality of our hearts to others, most especially those who hunger for love, understanding and respect, the bases of any relationship. When we are able to open the doors of our hearts with a sincere desire to offer the love of Christ, we too offer an Easter moment to others. Ultimately we too experience that Easter moment when we are able to hear Jesus saying to us, "Welcome into the Kingdom prepared for you since the foundation of the world, for I was hungry and you fed me….a stranger and you welcomed me…." Let us celebrate our Risen Christ this Easter and always through works of charity and mercy from the gracious hospitality of our hearts.[Postscript: Since 1966, Haley House has expanded its mission to include a Bakery (with a job training program), a Magazine (on entertainment and social awareness), Low Income Housing, and a Farm, all in support for the jobless, homeless and the poor. More information on Dorothy Day and the Catholic Worker Movement is available at http://www.catholicworker.org/]
(published in the CatholicNews March 2005)

Caryll Houselander

Thomas Merton